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How To Annoy Your Customers

young-businesswoman-in-stress

I sometimes wear ties. Mind you, I’m dragged kicking and screaming into the ancient and abominable art of male torture through neck binding, but I still occasionally put one on. And I get bored with them, so I’m always on the lookout for good looking ones.

So when I saw a Facebook ad offering Four Quality Ties for $1, they got my click.

FacebookTiesAd- No hidden fees!

(Notice that they specifically say “No hidden fees!” in the ad.)

By doing so I got wrapped up into one of the best examples of how to deceive and annoy your customers that I’ve seen in weeks.

The landing page seems well designed with a photo at the top, 18 ties that you can select, an order form on the bottom left and testimonials on the bottom right. The bottom of the page even has a guarantee and trust-type seals.

No mention of shipping charges, no mention of any other obligations. It appears on the surface to be a program designed to allow customers the ability to buy a sample of their wares at an inexpensive price.

It looked good, I was about to reward good marketing with my order. I was about ready to start choosing ties, when I noticed that you are required to check a box stating that you have read and agreed to their terms & conditions. I click that box, and the real deal is reveled:

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New Program Simplifies Online Advertising

Those of you who have been in contact with me for awhile know that I’m a huge fan of pay per click marketing. It’s one of the greatest marketing tools currently available to generate huge numbers of targeted potential buyers to your webpage or online sales letter.

One of the keys to success in pay per click marketing is running your ads on thousands, and in many cases, tens of thousands of keywords.

This strategy not only results in less expensive click traffic, but higher quality customers at the same time, because those who search for more specific keyword combinations tend to be farther along in the buying process than those who search for the generic term that describes the category.

Though this is a powerful, results-generating strategy, it comes at a huge price – the time required to sort though huge lists of keywords, culling out those that don’t apply, and putting them into logical ad groups for keyword advertising.

Frankly, to do this process right costs between 5-10 hours of mind-numbingly frustrating work. Seriously, you can’t hand-process keyword lists for more than about 20 minutes before your eyes start crossing and every line starts to look about the same.

As a manager of a number of high-powered, huge, expensive campaigns, I’ve done my time, spending far too many late nights slogging through yet another list.

If you’ve ever done it, you know exactly what I’m talking about…

So, you can imagine my excitement about two months ago as I talked for the first time with a guy I met on a pay per click teleconference named Richard East.

In that phone call Richard told me about a new program his team was creating that was designed specifically to handle the challenge of sorting through huge groups of keywords for pay per click and/or page-building programs.

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